Hanukkah & Christmas: Perfectly Aligned for a Blended America
So many people are searching, and they take a little from each spiritual encounter. This moment of distinct but star-aligned festivals is the perfect time to celebrate our blendedness.
I’m posting this on the day after “In This Moment” passed the 3,000-subscriber mark, less than three weeks after we got to 2,000. In addition to the 3,000 subscribers (now 3025), other “followers,” increase the total number of engaged readers to around 5,430 - plus forwards, re-stacks and social media clicks. It’s pretty remarkable, considering that last New Years Day there were about 300 subscribers, and then, when I left the brick-and-mortar rabbinate on June 30, that had doubled to 600 subscribers. Now that June number has grown fivefold.
With this growing virtual community, we are creating a new kind of “church” that transcends traditional boundaries, for a nation whose religious identity transcends simple definition. We Americans, of all birth-faiths, are all, in a deep sense “blended.” Even Cis-Jews like me! I pay tribute to this new American form of amalgamated religion in this pre-holiday posting. And I thank you, all who have climbed aboard this train over recent months. During 2025 I am hoping to increase the interactive nature of this site - while still keeping the paywall as low as possible. I do, however, really appreciate those who have invested in this important work with paid subscriptions.
Hanukkah and Christmas are perfectly aligned this year, as the eight-day Jewish festival begins at sundown on December 25. While a few days of overlap is not unusual, this convergence of beginnings is rare. We’ll next see this precise alignment in 2035, and after that not until 2054.
I’ve never been a big fan of Chrismukkah, the holiday mash-up popularized by the TV series The O.C. in 2003, an idea that actually originated in 19th century Germany, according to the Jewish Museum of Berlin. I’ve always felt that both religions are best served by preserving the integrity of each individual holiday, not combining them. I also have always been an advocate for Jews to look within their own faith for answers to the spiritual questions they are looking for. But this year’s unusual concurrence on the 25th (of Kislev and December), while no Harmonic Convergence portending global peace, does present opportunities to share distinct sacred moments with neighbors and members of our extended, multi-faith families.
For while the holidays might not be blended, many families are. And not only are more families blending, but increasingly within individual seekers we find a limitless variety of hybrid spiritual identities. So many are searching, and they take a little from each encounter, each spiritual lesson. This concurrent moment of star-aligned festivals is the perfect time to take note of that.
A new study from Pew indicates that the religiously unaffiliated – a group comprised of atheists, agnostic and a much larger amount who respond that their religion is "nothing in particular" - is now the largest cohort in the U.S. They are called the “Nones.”
I’m discovering, however, that in the current religious landscape, what Pew calls “Nones” could more accurately be called “Alls.” Comparatively few now spend their entire spiritual lives in the denomination where they grew up, according to a recent Public Religion Research Institute survey. A growing number of seekers partakes from a magnificent smorgasbord of different traditions everywhere they go, maintaining some loyalty to their chosen brand but open to sampling new wisdom, if only for a short time, before they move on.
This past summer, I retired from my brick-and-mortar pulpit of nearly 40 years and decided to take on an entirely new flock – on Substack. I had anticipated this move over two decades ago, when I wrote a book about how God can be discovered and sacred communities forged in cyberspace. Over the years, I’ve come to doubt my own theories and grown increasingly wary of online religion, even as it saved us during the Zoom days of Covid.
But now, having made the transition, I’m discovering something remarkable. As my Substack has grown rapidly, I’ve come to appreciate how much need there is out there, how many seekers are looking for spiritual alternatives, and the genuineness and intimacy of the human contact that takes place. It’s nothing like the trolling culture of other social media outlets like X, and because my subscription list is self-selecting – people subscribe because they are open to my ideas - the conversations are much more honest, friendly and soulful, precisely what I once envisioned online communication could be, and exactly what we need right now.
And no one is an outsider in this “church,” which in fact has no physical boundaries. It is a completely non-judgmental space. There are no impossible thresholds for admission, like, say, slicing off your foreskin. Many of my new congregants are neither Jewish nor Jewish-adjacent. They are just “Jewish-curious,” or simply on their own unique journey, and they’ve decided to check out a fellow traveler’s answers to their very human questions. That fellow traveler just happens to be a rabbi.
Even my dogs came back from a recent grooming wearing Christmas bandanas. Although they have been with me since puppyhood, making them CisJewPoos, they are clearly on a spiritual journey of their own.
I reiterate that I am not an advocate for poodle apostasy - or for anyone to run from their own childhood faith foundation. But long before there was social media, I pressed for Jews to “shul-hop,” as I did with my friends during our teen years. We had our home base, but would wander on occasion, from Conservative to Orthodox to Reform synagogues, to Chabad and Hillel and new-age Havurot (fellowships) that proliferated in Boston in the ‘70s. Other synagogues were not as comfortable as my own, but neither was it as comfortable to spend the night in my grandma’s guest room as in my own bed. That discomfort didn’t make my grandmother less “family” to me, nor did it make me more reluctant to visit.
America has become a nation of shul, church, temple and mosque hoppers.
When I wrote about my own journey in a recent Substack posting, a number of comments demonstrated the blended, messy openness of my new community.
One woman wrote:
“I find your words inspiring. I started my life as a Roman Catholic - went to Catholic school until 8th grade. As an adult I found the Unitarian faith - they believe there is no "right" religion - that some basic truths are found in all religions…. I'm not affiliated with any religion now but feel in my heart that being a good person, loving others as well as yourself is truly the way to live a good life and be happy.”
Another wrote:
“Wow! I am not Jewish but grew up with friends who are. Why am I saying wow? I have been digging deep into my faith…”
She went on to describe her struggles with her father’s death when she was 25, then added,
“I am 50 and my mom just passed. Finding a church especially now is a struggle. Since the election I am trying to understand everything and all the wars/conflicts… What you wrote touched my heart because as I struggle to find my home church, I really needed to hear your take as well. I know this is a lot, but something I have been dealing with is Faith. Thanks for what you wrote, because the timing was so spot on!”
Another reader joined in the conversation:
Thank you for writing this Substack, Rabbi. I am a member of the tribe. Although my practices follow an Eastern path (I consider myself a HinJew), I’m grateful for my inescapable Jewishness. It’s nice to be here and read what you write.
And another:
Not that it matters, but I grew up in a Jewish community - I am not - had wonderful and close Jewish friends, went to many Bar Mitzvahs (I'm 'old' and the girls were not having their religious ceremonies then), dated a great Jewish guy for years and have learned a lot from these relationships. I stumbled across your blog on Substack and am looking forward to reading it in the weeks ahead.
And finally:
Well Rabbi, thanks to Meidas Touch I recently started reading your Substack. I attended Catholic School through High School. I claim no specific religion now. My neighborhood was in the poor end of town. I didn't know that at the time. lol Within a 12 block radius anything we needed was available. There were 3 Jewish businesses, a pharmacy, a pawn shop and an appliance store. There was the Chinese fresh chicken store and vege store. There were two Italian grocery stores, one of which had a fresh meat counter, i.e., no packages of frozen meat. There was a dry cleaners and Chinese laundry. A YMCA where boxing was promoted and sometimes men could stay there. My mother had a used clothing store and across the street there was another one. My friends were the children of the Mrs. and one son was with her Jewish husband. Although religion was never a topic they were the kindest people that I knew. I almost forgot, there was also a theater. It changed ownership many times, one time it was only Mexican movies, then it was porno movies and finally a strip show. Called homeless now there were many "bums". who begged quarters so they could buy a bottle of cheap wine. Then there was the "crazy" lady who stood on one corner most of the day talking -- mostly to herself.
I'm not really sure why I posted all of this. I grew up in such a mixed neighborhood and obviously people would have different religions, cultures, etc., but, none of that mattered. We were all people working to make a living and getting along.
I look forward to reading more of what you have to say and like your clarification of different sayings and words. After 37 years you have probably seen it all and am glad that you have decided to keep giving. :-).
It’s an incredible array of stories and I encourage you to share yours!
I suddenly feel responsible for these people, for all of you, and relatively few of you fall neatly into a denominational category. But religiously speaking, you clearly are not “Nones.” They – you – clearly have “got” religion and are looking for more. Some of will fly off to another Substack guru or just fly from any religious connection, which is your prerogative. But some will want to hang around and hear my take on the latest craziness out there – and others will just be seeking to hear a voice, any voice that cares.
I presume that many of this Substack’s new subscribers and followers do not have a home church and it’s easy to see why. The brick-and-mortar religious world has trouble accounting for spiritual fluidity. Every square peg needs to fit into a square hole. Bills have to be paid, and funds have to be raised, which requires affiliation. When membership is the key metric, indoctrination becomes the prime method.
But that’s not what’s going on out there. People don’t want to be told what to believe. A growing number of these spiritual hybrids prefer not to be pigeonholed. But make no mistake. They are renouncing the pigeon, not the religion.
For those who sped to the end of this posting, let me summarize in bold letters:
The religious landscape right now is fascinating - so many blends. No one is “pure” anything. This opens up enormous opportunities for dialogue. What Pew surveys call “Nones” (no religion) is more accurately described as “Alls.” Everyone is searching. Fewer have landed on a single faith, or single denomination of that faith. This online environment, with fewer physical boundaries than a brick-and-mortar house of worship, is the perfect place for us all to meet.
So, Christmas and Hanukkah, two discrete holidays from two very different faith traditions, will fall on the same day this year. This unique confluence will allow each faith group – and each individual seeker – to celebrate their distinct and evolving journeys concurrently, perhaps even with latke-flavored eggnog.
And together, we can share the cumulative joy of living in a country where these spiritual journeys can happen at all, where there separation between religion and state allows for the integration of our spiritual lives.
